Break Free From Shame: Your 3-Minute Guide

There’s one problem I encounter with people more than anything else: shame. The irony is that more people feel shame today than ever—not because of anything they have done wrong, but because of all the wrong that has been done to them. In less than three minutes, I’m going to tell you how to break the process of shame. In the Old Testament, many people struggled with shame. Gideon was hiding from his enemies at night when God found him. Rahab was a woman of ill repute when she joined the people of Israel. Bathsheba became the queen mother under very questionable circumstances. Even Ruth, who was pure of heart, was an outsider with a questionable reputation because she was a foreigner. All of these people discovered that, with God, there is no shame. God fought Gideon’s battle for him and made him a legend. He made Rahab part of Jesus’ family tree. He gave Bathsheba the opportunity to demonstrate wisdom and virtue—and she did. Ruth became an icon of spiritual motherhood in the Old Testament. What is shame? It is a feeling of foolishness or embarrassment for having done something bad or wrong. But shame is best understood as a process. Many children in a fallen world find themselves trapped in terrible circumstances that no child should have to face. Often, they have parents who are emotionally abusive or manipulative. The only way to cope is through the process of shame: They take all the responsibility for everything upon themselves and do what they can to make things right. This can be highly effective. It allows them to survive and cope with a painful childhood. The problem is that, when they leave childhood, the process and feeling of shame often remain—even though their circumstances have changed. What is necessary is to identify what this looks like. What negative pattern is playing out in your current relationships? Where did it begin? How can it be broken? One of the essential goals of the spiritual life is to stand before God and other people without shame. When you feel shame, take it to prayer and give it to Jesus and Mary. You are a beloved son or a beloved daughter of God, and there is never shame in that. Breathe in me, O Breath of God, in my broken heart. Renew the true [unclear].